Returning
and being known.
The land here in rural New England where I’ve spent the last few weeks is nearly identical to the land that I was raised on.
I am deeply known by these Beings — the maple, the pines, the squirrels, the rivers, the soil, the snow. I deeply know them. Sometimes, the grandmother moniker gets used because someone is older, an elder maybe. It usually says more about them than you. In this case, these ones actually feel like relatives. They knew me before I knew I was a me. They have spoken to me since before I could speak. It’s exactly like when my late grandma’s face would scrunch up in a wrinkle of time, and she would tell me I’ve been making the same gesture since I was a two-year-old. “You’ve been asking us these same questions since you were a baby” the forest offers me. How strange and comforting to be known like this. I am able to have a deeper understanding of my own life simply by being back in proximity to them. I can feel all 34 of my years, the long, windy roads away and back to here. A deep level of resource is available simply by gazing upon these deeply familiar faces.
In the desert, I felt seen. I felt recognized. I felt witnessed. I felt welcomed. A soulmate level resonance, for sure. Something deeply life affirming and chosen. But my bones aren’t made of the red rocks and picky pears and snakeskins— they are made of small stones, deerskins, the February ice, and fur. These Beings are the guardians to the bones of my recent peoples. The way the later winter sunlight lands just on the surface of the dirt, but not yet penetrating it, grazing the surface that would otherwise be covered in the shade of the leaves in warmer months. This is how my bones know it is still the time to descend. It is still the time for hibernation and integration. It is still the time to surrender into the darkness and let it hold me.
It’s hard to be here in the winter. Which is to say: it’s hard to be with myself. I’ve been having the humbling experience of how uncomfortable and painful my inner world is. I want to say “still,” but the truth is that I only uncovered the full map of my life in the past couple of years. Before that, I was just looking at the scale in the corner thinking that was the whole map, never comprehending what "an inch equals a mile" really meant.
With that, I welcome you to Pisces Season. As the resident Double Pisces™️ — here is a box of tissues and a lap to cry in. Stay inside and dream and cry and write and dance.
As these watery times tug at your tender heart, I’m here for support…
Ancestral Lineage Healing sessions and packages. Ancestral Lineage Healing is a type of spiritual repair work that addresses deep attachment and cultural wounds through contact and meditative time with your ancestral lineages.
Mediumship readings. A form of connection and communication with the human dead. By allowing a connection with these Beings images, feelings, and messages can be transmitted to the living via the medium (me.)
Good Grief: Guided Sessions. Together, we look at how your grief needs to be seen, and co-create ritual and meaning to support you in your process. I provide energetic assistance, clarity, direction, and connection to the unfolding. You tend and nurture your grief. There is nothing that needs to be fixed. You are grieving, you are not broken.
Ignite your Intuition: An Initiation into the Mysteries of Mediumship. Cohort Two, launching soon!